Sunday, February 7, 2021 - Atlanta, GA
Drop the needle,
Today marks 26 years alive. Most would be in bliss and celebration but I am not. I feel I have been cursed to daydream a life of bliss and fun, yet live in unfulfillment. What have I truly done worthy of a legacy my family would be proud of? I could use the truth yet excuse that this pandemic has altered the life that I once knew but I can't.
I am saddened of the thought that every year my life is bought back to the centerfold and I still have nothing to offer it. This is not what I dreamed. What do I have to show? I was terrified of growing up when I was a child and now that fear is an unrelenting reality. Growing older has bought temporary happiness and constant pain. How do I keep going with no clue what it is that I offer this world?
I am told that birthdays spent with loved ones should be a reminder of love, but I'm not sure that it does. For me, it lets me know that I haven't made a dent or ripple in the ocean that is my desires. Where do I go from here?