Sunday, December 16, 2018 - Sacramento, CA
Drop the needle,
I sit and think about the journey that I have been on. I sought out to be a brave protector of people. Someone who protects the people, build a legacy, love hard. In the past 6 months, I have battled with my own heart and mind about the woman I seek and wish to become. I looked in the mirror and didn't see me. I saw a broken yet strong woman, begging to be loved in a way that doesn't hurt to touch, yet burns memories into her mind as if to brand her thoughts with such sweet pain.
I see a woman pouring her love, joy, and kindness into the world that refuses to let her breathe. A woman who wants a family that may very well only exist in her dreams. Ready to be given a love that even she can't deny. A love that chooses her back. A love she can spend the rest of her life building on.
Will that kind of love find me in my reality or will I have to settle for the love that only exists in my dreams. I am beyond satisfied with the love of God, but I am cursed with wanting more.